Sunday, October 10, 2021

Session 4: My New Best Friend is a Fun Guy

So we are investigating where the gnomes had wandered off to, and me, ah yes I know the gnomes, I know they tend to get distracted and wander off, and I know how much they love mushrooms so I was really on top of things. So we find a large mushroom house in a gully, and to my brain this seems like exactly the kind of place you would find goblins, and I listened at the mushroom door of the mushroom house and my sensitive ears they detect the telltale sounds of greenies so I open that door and prepare to give them a piece of my mind.

To my absolute shock, the mushroom house had mushroom people in it! Sacre bleu! Then these mushroom people say something in mushroom and then they shoot mushroom pods at me, and that kind of hurt, but I am getting used to it. My instincts, they tell me to hold the door and make the mushroom people come to me, perhaps they are just goblins in disguise, maybe so I ought to be extra cunning and not let them hurt my gentle friends. The mushroom goblins just keep on shooting me though, and then Ash casts a spell and very explicitly tells me now is the best time to charge in, so I do zis. It was about then that I had an epiphany, the big mushroom guy was actually not a goblin at all, he was a really good guy, and my friends were probably wrong, but I know that most of them were also fun guys. I was really perplexed, but then I noticed that my new friend was on fire!!! Oh no, I must put him out, which I did and I tried to tell him not to keep catching on fire because I hate to see my friends fight, and I hate to see my new mushroom friend keep doing this to himself, it really triggers my ennui. Then he catches on fire again! What am I to do but put him out as I had already prepared. I tell him, please stop doing this to yourself, it is tearing my heart out, then my new friend tries to tear my heart out literally. This must have been a mistake and luckily my armor stopped it, but he would have felt really badly if he had been able to do so!

Then he catches on fire again! Cloony really needs to be more careful, so I try and put him out again, but he dodges. He must have been in a panic, I wish we could talk better, I should learn mushroom! Then he accidentally stabs me, and next thing I know I wake up and the gnome also got really hurt and the gnomes in the village are back to gnormal and they heal my ailments.


Such a day, I wonder what happened to my new friend?

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